Of Manners --- A Simple View

First, I'd like to define exactly what I'm talking about for this post.

Manners 

1. social conduct 

2. a socially acceptable way of behaving

We are surrounded by people all the time. How we treat  them is the same way we want to be treated. I hold a high regard for people, and I respect them because they simply are.


            Manners[and I don't mean to include 'mannerisms' in this post]. It's essentially how you behave among other people. It has got to do with how you handle yourself and how you behave, in any place. Take for example, after eating a candy or cupcake; manners mean that you don't carelessly throw your wrapper anywhere in the street. One, it indicates indifference towards the environment.Two, it makes the streets look dirty. Three, it shows no discipline.

            There are reasons why we have manners and why we do them. Sometimes its because we have to think of the people around us and what effect it would have on them. And sometimes its because we simply respect our surroundings and where we are. We sneeze on a handkerchief because we can't spray saliva on people or have them catch a cold after we do. We sit properly in a restaurant because it is a formal place; we don't make loud conversations because we also respect other people's conversations and avoid disturbing them.


             As such, I've mentioned discipline. Having good manners is also being able to discipline yourself, to control your actions. Spitting anywhere is definitely not an appreciating sight. This is part of discipline, to spit in the right places, out of the eyes of the public. It is only excused when you really need to. Having manners also represents your respect to other people and to traditions and culture. Cultures and traditions are different in each place. And being able to adjust and adhere to it is showing good manners. But basic manners definitely apply anywhere.


            Familiarity of course, is a different thing. We show manners to people whom we become acquainted with, but our actions become relaxed when we are with familiar people, but not overstepping boundaries. And we can definitely do what we want in the privacy of our home. 


            Manners also occur at many different levels in the society. The higher the level, the more manners it entails. Table manners, for example, get very complicated along with social status. Everyone knows how to use a spoon and fork, especially for us Filipinos. But for very wealthy people at formal, social parties, eating can become a chore for those unfamiliar with the array of spoons, forks, sporks and knives arranged in the table. I, for that matter, don't even know which to use for what. I've only gotten to learn up to using knives and forks with no spoons in eating food. But don't despair, you don't have to deal with these things unless you get invited to these kinds of events. But for those with high social status, all these things become part of their education and they know their ways by heart. We all learn these things along the way.


             But please, don't think of manners as being too stiff. That's not my point. Manners is simply part of thinking before acting, and a way in which you properly present yourself to the world. Your actions simply represent who you are. Like for example, dressing properly represents respect for yourself, confidence and a care for yourself. On the other hand, dressing sloppily indicates the opposite. Most of manners is brought on with a great deal of common sense. And you'll need common sense everywhere you go. 


            Manners is important to me simply because I respect people and the environment around me. I put things back where they belong after I use them because I respect the person who owns it and placed it there. 


I may not have impeccable manners, but I certainly do mind mine.